Stressful life

Well, my life has been stressful lately, many fights going on in my life. Ive been getting involved or getting stressed over BS that dosent involve me. When i get worked up, my blood pressure gets high, therefore my blood pressure has been high. I try to be the person that stops the fighting, but i only make it worse. I have been getting involved more than i should have. 

My grades were not what i wanted them to be. I feel i will have people being dissapointed in me because they know im a smart girl, and im capable of doing better. On that note, i know what i need to do nxt semester to bring my grades higher.  

Update12/24 I got a C in every course. Final GPA was a 2.00

I have been LYING. I lied to somebody i REALLY should not have, I have been trying to stop. I stoped for awhile. I did it to cover the way i feel, and to protect both mine and his feelings. However, it only hurts that person, and gets me introuble. Im probably gonna be cut off next time, if he does not catch me, with this one.

Usually my blood pressure is high, well i have not been feelin well so i had my aunt look at me. I have had low sugar one day, high the next. I have had alot going on.

Im completly stressed to the max. My aunt is in the Hospital Hospice care unit, i have two jobs i have been workin, and im going back to school in two weeks. I also just break up with my boyfriend. Nothing can seem to go my way. Im just emotionally drained. 

Thanksgiving Day Challenge

Your mission for Thanksgiving was to send people "Happy Thanksgiving and Thank You"!!

Some people forwarded me there message. As i promised, i would post mine. 

Who i thanked(other than my family)

My 12th grade science tutor who is like a dad to me. Thank you for always being here for me, and never giving up on me.

My friends who keep me out of trouble. Who are here for me, who i can talk to about everything  

Thanksgiving Challenge

 #Thanksgiving Challenge -- find someone you are grateful for and thank them!!!! Tell them why you are grateful for them being in your life.!!!! 

Happy Thanksgiving!

If you don't see them call or text them, send then a email, a letter. 

Just send "Thank You, and explain why"

Post some as a comment, tweet them to me, i would like to hear some. Ill post mine, in next post!!!

Im sorry.

This topic is important to me, im literally tearing up writing this. We all make mistakes in life, and sometimes hurt the people in our lives we care about.In my previous post i told you, i went back and started lying to that Special Person (dad2), i feel bad, i cant say "I'm sorry" because it lost it meaning. 

You would think he would be mad at me, but its the opposite, I'm kinda mad at him.

I've lied one to many times, to people that have a special place in my heart. One person, in particular. Can you guess the person? Well, i hope this poem, i wrote, means more than a regular sorry. And that one person, can tell how sincere i really am. Well, lets hope, here it is.

IM SORRY FOR MY ACTIONS

IM SORRY FOR MY BEHAVIOR

IM SORRY FOR MY LYING

I CANT TAKE IT BACK

I WISH I COULD                                         I FEEL SO MUCH GUILT

I KNOW WHAT I DID WAS WRONG

I DONT KNOW WHAT, GOT INTO MY MIND

FROM DEEP INSIDE MY HEART, I BRING THIS APOLOGY

I know there is no valid excuse for what i did, im really sorry. I truly care, and what i did was unfair.

I really hope you can forgive me, i really feel awful about lying again. I beat myself up for doing this. 

Latest Update

I thought i would write today. Have not wrote in couple weeks. 

The past couple weeks, i have many ups and downs. 

As Dad 2 would say"my blood pressure is just where i want it", its not, its 104/91. Ive been getting migraines lately, been getting in arguments with parents. I went back and started lying to Dad 2, after i haven't in awhile. You would think he would be mad at me, buts its kinda the opposite. 

The only fun, positive things are i GOT A JOB, and I'm doing volunteer work in a classroom. I also  went to a basketball game this week with my brother, it was a blast. 

I tell everyone to pay attention to their health, not pay attention to negative things, i really mean it. When your in school like i am, its hard to pay attention to school work with negative things going on in your life. I would know, I'm in the middle if withdrawing from a class. 

I will write more, lots going on.  

My life.

I really hate my life sometimes, I Don't get any quite time while doing College. My dad acts like a little kid, calls me names, but when i give it back to him " im a bitch". I get in fights with my dad. Like just recently i got in a fight and punched him. 

Im afraid to check my blood pressure, cause i know its high. I feel sick almost two times a week. 

 I have had enough with all this crap, its to the point where i want to withdrawal from some college classes becauseI'm  failing or have a D in a class. I want to move out,but i cant because i have to focus on my education.

. I just dont want to be with my family at all. Im crying myself to bed at some nights. I cry myself to sleep because of the disrespect i get, cause I'm not doing good in college, because i feel like a bad daughter and sister. 

I lie constantly to people to cover up mu feelings. 

HIGH ON SHIRLEY TEMPLE

I never had so much fun before at a Friends house. I spent the night at a friends house. Had some Shirley Temples, and coke. Almost had a broken nose, turned out to be a sprain. Woke up to headaches. 

I will do that all over again